Bonjour, Ciao, Hola, Nǐ hǎo!
Just stopping by to say Hello
It’s been quite a while since I last posted here. And quite honestly, I wasn’t sure I’d be back at all; as I find myself feeling an ever increasing aversion to anything web based, especially social media. And when Substack (the place I host this blog/newsletter) made the move to look and feel more like a social media network, I was more than a bit turned off by it. But, here I am. No matter how much of a creative rut I am in, or how disenchanted I am with the World Wide Web, I find myself needing to express my creativity in familiar ways, such as the written word. Even if just to say hello, and to catch up with all my lovely readers.
As I type this I’m sitting in a Starbucks, with my amazing husband, listening to my Alt Rock play list (currently on Arcade Fire’s Wake Up) and having a cup of tea. I’m in my happy place. I have no appointments, no obligations, no place to rush off to. I can just sit here for hours if I want, and be happy and content in this little bubble. Well, as long as the batteries hold out anyway. *Edit: It’s another day again, and I’m once again at a different Starbucks listening to my Alt Rock playlist that is currently on Muse’s Supermassive Black Hole. And yes, my husband is here too.
It’s once I leave the confines of this blissful little bubble that the reality of my depression and anxiety kicks in again. I remember once again that I live 1000 miles away from my truly wonderful son, and that the world is literally on fire, and people are going hungry and have no roof over their heads, and we can’t trust our governments to keep us safe from even the most basic of things, such as hate. I remember that I’m in a creative rut and don’t even have the physical or mental energy to participate in activities that were once so precious to me, such as my photography. I remember that summer is almost over and that my SAD will soon kick into high gear, making it much more difficult to manage the depression and anxiety. It all comes crashing down on me, and I wish I could stay in my bubble forever, but alas life doesn’t work that way. *Edit: yeah, I know that wasn’t exactly positive, but it is how I was feeling that day, and honestly a lot of days lately.
So, while I’m here in my happy place, I try to make the most of it. So far, this post has taken several weeks (*edit: and then some!), because there doesn’t seem to be enough time for me to finish it with all the rewrites, and limited bubble time. I’m sure I will get it done one day, but what it will end up looking like, I can’t even begin to predict. And even now, my husband is ready to go and I’m asking for 10 more minutes. *Edit: he gave more at least 30 more minutes and I still didn’t get done.
Since I last posted I’ve made a solo trip to the states to see my son and some of my family, and my husband and I have been on several road trips, all of which have been to cities in Pennsylvania. First we went to Philadelphia, then Erie, and lastly Pittsburgh. You’d probably get the impression that we are obsessed with PA, and maybe we are a bit, but I think it has more to do with its proximity to us than anything else. I mean hello, if we lived in Alberta we might be obsessed with Montana. Who knows. Anyway… that’s been about it as far as travel goes this year.
I’m working full time in the accounting department at my place of employment, and though I’m enjoying the new role, it’s time consuming (as I don’t get 3 days off work anymore), and about as far from creative as you can get. Numbers all day long! It’s a calculated change, and one that will help me meet my longterm goals, but it is a sacrifice nonetheless, and I’m adjusting. But it leaves me needing to dive back into my creative pursuits to balance it all out.
I’m considering other creative pursuits, such as learning a musical instrument, since I am a very musical person. I’m thinking the guitar, but have also tossed around the idea of the violin and piano. I think in the end the guitar would prove a more worthy pursuit and I could rock out to all my fav alt rock songs. Win! No matter what I choose, I will need lessons, so I’ll have to budget that in.
Let’s see… I’m also going to start the process to get a 29 year old tattoo removed from my ankle. It was once upon a time a rose, but now it looks more like a fluffy dandelion. Ha! It needs to go, as it was one of my stupid youthful mistakes. That process begins next Saturday and I’m told it could take two years. I’m crossing my fingers that I am one of the lucky few that only need about half the treatments.
Anymore news? Hmm… We went to the Toronto Indy race, which was pretty cool. We also met up with some of our wonderful photography friends in Toronto for a photowalk through the city. Next, Brandon and I will be going to see The Smashing Pumpkins for his birthday, and we’re both very excited by that. It’s our jam! We are going to follow that up with going to see a Toronto FC match, finally. So, I guess all in all it’s a pretty eventful summer. It’s not European travel, but not every year can be European travel. Sadly enough.
Anyway… that’s about all the time I have in my bubble today. I’ll try to find some time to throw in a few photos from my travels this summer and get this posted in a timely manner. We’ll see how that goes though. *Edit: there are photos below, but they are all from my trusty iPhone 11, so nothing to brag about. But you get the picture. Ha! See what I did there?
I hope you are all doing well! Let’s catch up in the comments below or by replying to this email. I’d love to hear about your summer adventures.
Also, I gave up on Twitter and deactivated my account a few weeks ago. So, I am now down to just my private Instagram, and this blog. Baby steps.
Until next… be loving, be kind, be better!